Nov 21 List a book you are thankful to have read and how it has inspired you to be better at what you do
About a year ago I read Sam Harris's book Lying, which explores the rarity of complete honesty. Harris examines the implied I-know-what-you-can-handle-and-what-you-can't assumption behind even small lies and inspires the bravery to stop saying what you don't mean.
It's an exhilarating idea, one I've been striving towards since reading--and re-reading--the book. I was surprised to find just how often I am tempted to avert the truth, to gloss over or avoid unpleasant realities. Harris asserts that total honesty brings a new level of authenticity to living, and he's right.
One aspect of honesty that I've embraced since reading the book is the policy of not saying something behind someone's back that I am unwilling to say to his/her face. If I want to complain about an administrator or fuss about a student, I owe that person a direct conversation.
This approach has worked in two directions: it has prevented me from saying some things that didn't need to be said, and it has emboldened me to initiate some difficult, needed conversations.
On the home front, I didn't realize how often I would fudge the truth, telling my husband "I'm on the way home" when I was still in the thick of helping a student, or saying "working on school stuff" to cover vague frittering on the internet.
Since reading Harris's book, I (try to) avoid even the whitest lies. It's a challenging, freeing way to approach each day.
I have areas in my life that are not yet in truthful alignment. I struggle to balance my weekly church attendance with my vague-to-the-point-of-atheism beliefs. (I almost wrote "agnosticism," then decided I wasn't being honest.) I justify sitting in church--and on church council!--as a card-carrying doubter under the tenet that doubting is a part of a faith walk, and doubters have as much right to a pew as believers. Plus my husband is a Christian and likes me at his side.
So. Once again my blog did not end where I intended it to. Thanks for listening, in all honesty.
Sounds like another book to add to my list! I love your honesty with yourself here, especially as you lead yourself into territory you didn't intend to tread into.
ReplyDeleteOh thank you, dear Missy. The book is slim. You'll read it in under two hours. Want you to know I just ordered "Odd Girls Out" AND "Real Boys." Thanks for connecting.
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