Days #224-226 Writing Through COVID-19: Finding Comfort, Choosing Happy

It was a difficult week at AHS as the student injured in last Sunday's accident remains in a coma. We are fragile and frightened. Emotions are raw.

Despite the challenges this week, I can remind myself I have the best job.

I am basically paid to spend my day with funny, vulnerable, brave, young people. They're inquisitive and creative, easily distracted, passionate. They are hungry to discover who they are and how they can use their skills and voices in meaningful ways.  

And because I'm an English teacher, I get to introduce teenagers to brilliant poets and writers who help us understand ourselves and the human condition. We write daily to discover our own questions and insights. 

Even on hard days, we find reasons to laugh.

Even in hard times, we support each other.

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Our district held parent-teacher conferences on Wednesday and Thursday. I met via Zoom with dozens of parents/grandparents/guardians to discuss their students' learning. 

P-T conferences are always a workout. Back-to-back 12-hour days of intense conversations leave me wiped. Conducting conferences on Zoom this year added a technology twist: parents showed up with bad audio; two sessions froze due to unstable internet connections; I had to juggle my screen-sharing to avoid accidentally displaying grades for the wrong student. 

However, on the plus side, I had high parent turnout. I think Zooming in for conferences was easier than finding childcare, driving to the school, and waiting outside classrooms. I hope when the pandemic is over we can retain some of the positives we're learning. Parents should be given an on-line conference option even when we're not social distancing.

I ended Day #2 of conferences with the same baseline thought I've had since my first year of teaching 37 years ago: Parents love their kids. They want to know I love them too.
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I logged a crisp three miles on the trail Friday and again this morning while listening to an audiobook by my new favorite mystery writer: Louise Penny. I accidentally bought All the Devils Are Here, the 16th book in her series about Inspector Gamache. (I thought I was buying The Devils All the Time, which I'm now reading in pulp, and which is also excellent, if grisly.) I liked Inspector Gamache so much, I circled back and am now listening to the first book in the series. 

Penny's writing reminds me of the Crime Queen genius P.D. James: rich, multi-layered characters; thoughtful, startling prose. That they're also rich mysteries is a bonus! Discovering Penny and realizing I have another 14  Gamache books in my future is a happy thought.
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I like happy thoughts. 

My brother calls me Pollyanna, as if my desire to invest my mental energy in positive spaces is a weakness. 
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A few weeks ago I blogged about a student who penned a poem about the Blanky he still sleeps with as a 14-year-old. I rejoiced as his classmates praised his poem and his refusal to let go of the soft fabric comfort that helps him feel calm as he falls asleep, refusing to bow to others' judgement.
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Let me say this: Finding ways to comfort oneself--with a blanket or happy thoughts--is an essential life skill. Rather than look at self-comfort and self-calming as weaknesses, we should see them as strengths.

Days are tough. 2020 days are tougher. 
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Last night I delivered a new puzzle to my mother-in-law. I played two hands of Bridge via Zoom with my dad. I shared a couple of funny dog TikToks with my kids. I mailed a package to my grandson in New Zealand. 

These actions made me feel happy. 

I'm cozy now under a soft blanket.

Enough.
Be well.
Write.

Allison

 

Wolf is finding his voice!