"Let me be your hostess," I said. "I'm pretty sure you've fed me a few meals."
My dad laughed, and let it go.
My parents are (were?) both so smart and funny. While they have different senses of humor (I favor my dad's), they are quick to laugh at themselves and at each other.
A willing laugh is a gift. I know people (I might be married to one) who are stingy with their laughter. They hold it in reserve, as if to give laughter is to lose something.
But back to the two laughing people in my basement: they do not want to be a burden. They have spent their lives on the giving end of the give-receive continuum.
I am reminded of Marge Peircy's "To Be of Use" poem. We all need to contribute, to feel useful. But just how useful can two old people be?
1) They feed their dog and take him for walks. (Reason #5485 everyone should have a pet.)
2) They set their table and wash their dishes.
3) Today my mom helped me wash three more windows.
4) They make their own fruit salad out of mushy grapes and spotty bananas.
5) They walk their dog. Wait, I already said that.
Enough.
Stay well.
Write.
Allison
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| My dad walking Vern, March 30, 2020 |
Thank you for the poem (which I'd never read) and the thinking. Your parents and this post make me wonder how much I've placed my worth on being "useful" and what that looks like now. You continue to inspire every day!
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